You’ve heard the expression lead, follow or get out of the way. Those of us in positions of leadership many times seem satisfied to stand on the sidelines hopelessly waiting for “it” to magically happen. Like any skill, sometimes we just need a good dose of education to fill in the holes, answer the questions, force us to be vulnerable and realize we are humans and we have fears and doubts when it comes to leading and being in charge of people.
When looking at the definition of lead, leading and leadership, it looks simple, add people to each definition and it starts to hit the grey area of asking ourselves, I want to be liked and be effective! Yet, every day I hear horror stories from friends, family and clients on poor leadership choices.
Lead Defined: To initiate in an action and example for others to follow to go before or with to show the way; conduct or escort: to conduct by holding and guiding; to influence or induce; cause: to guide in direction, course, action, opinion, etc. to conduct or bring in a particular course.
No matter what definition you use, it comes down to one common denominator as to why most of us fail at leading. We are not bad people and the people we lead for the most part aren’t bad, we are just not good at emotionally managing ourselves and others. Because that is what is it…emotions!
Really… Leadership is simple if you think about what you expect and how you want to be treated, you want to feel acknowledged, you want people to be honest and compassionate, you want to be recognized and you want to be communicated to…… now do that for others!
I understand its scary being responsible for others or to confront others when things are not going well. A survey was recently conducted and it shares that 87% of the time most leaders were doing a good job; it’s the 13% of the time when your leadership reputation is at stake and that is when others are counting on you to be the LEADER! To confront situations, manage behaviors, make decisions and communicate effectively to as many as necessary if not everyone to ensure they feel safe.
I will restate the last few words of that sentence “so they feel safe” uncertainty is the driver of anxiety, so as leaders we have to be more effective at connecting, communicating, and coaching others to success so we in turn can have success and a good night’s sleep.
So how do you make others feel safe?
Be authentic instead of accusatory
Be genuine instead of generic
Be bold instead of brash
Be compassionate instead of cruel
Be curious instead of confrontational
Be courageous instead of cowardly
Be clear instead of confusing
Be inquisitive instead of indifferent
Be truthful instead of treacherous
Be fair instead of favoritism
Be grateful instead of gossipy
Be transparent instead of troubled
Be YOU instead of someone else so they can be them instead of who you are expecting them to be so they can give you what you want and they can feel good and safe about who they are and finally …you can feel good about them and yourself as a leader!
See… I told you leadership is simple! However, just in case you need a bit more join me at Millennium for a fun interactive treat in the class titled Twinkie Teamwork. Find out more on leadership trainings with Bonnie Bonadeo at Naked Audience Productions.com
Bonnie Bonadeo -President and Founder of The Beauty Agents™ Speaker Bureau and Training Company, Beauty Goorus Consulting and Co-Founder of Naked Audience Productions. She has represented the beauty industry for over 30 years by, Connecting People to the Power of Beauty. Bonnie’s experience s in the industry started as a stylist, to managing salons, and working for some of the most notable manufacturers and distributors to directing the industry’s most celebrated events such as NAHA, Beacon, Symposium, ISSE and Beauty Changes Lives. She is producing the program STAGES and L.E.A.D. to support mastering the art of authentic speaking, leading and communications skills and is committed to building quality educators, sales people and leaders. Bonnie volunteers her time to Look Good Feel Better and Student Mentor Programs and is recognized as the go-to expert and connector on all facets of the industry, and has PR mentions in Cosmopolitan, Oprah’s O Magazine, and New York Times as well as numerous trade journals. Be sure to follow her blog on www.Modernsalon.com